sometmes i could just kick myself.i wish i could go back in time, back to when my love asked me if the buthead could move in with us and what i thought of it all. I felt suspicious. I felt like there was a train wreck a commin'. I felt like sayin 'can we make him read The Ethical Slut, discus the book with us and share his views and find out what he poly means, then maybe give him a 6 month trial period?'. But, no. Sigh... I love my wife, and truely love seeing her happy...and i know i do not allways communicate well, sometimes im on a roll when it comes to finding all the wrong things to say. Knowing that my toungue and my brain often conspire against me, how could i possibly tell my sweet love that i didnt see this lasting long. My first clue was when he divied up the week with him getting the majority of my wife's time, leaving me the weekend which i had to also share with the bouncy boy. I was a bit outraged when i heard the news, and thats putting it mildly. My wife assured me that his scheduel would not be happening,still it did not set well with me and made me susspicious of him and his verry odd idea of poly...but that wasnt the only black mark, just the first thatmade me warry. I got the verry distinct feeling that he thought that because my wife is also my Dominant and owner, he too would also share in the ownership of me and he would inherit a slave to be at his beck an call. Yea, no! Sorry dude! So now not only dose he have shady poly ethics, but questionable BDSM ones as well. Things have only seemingly gotten more pronounced since moving to e-town, where he is closer to his girlfriend, who is no better at poly. We barely see her, and when we do it seems like she treats us as if we have the begining onset signs of the plague. And hearing the way she fons over him and puts her hands on him and says 'mine,all mine!' from my wife...well it just makes me want to smack his girlfriend! Hard! Thats soooo not poly, and she knows it! He thinks its cute and harmless. Maybe in private it is, but not when they are both out together having dinner out with my wife! Poly is about sharring, not seeing who can one-up the other people in the poly relationship! It just kills me to see my wife crying because of them! Now the girlfriend is his primary, and we have allready seen what his idea of an equal division of time looks like! Yea,just like he wanted to do me, hes doing that to my wife! And,he has also became my wife's caregiver but dose next to none of the work he claims to do. How can he? He isnt here, nor is he physically capable, or willing, to do the things he is saying he is doing. Who is doing them? Me. But im off topic...anyway, he even plans on marrying the new girlfriend and running off to go live in cuba for a year. Is he spending more time or at least better quality time with my wife? Nope, nothing has changed,which also happens to be his favorite saying. He sleeps over there the majority of the time now, because he can get his girlfriend to wait on him like a lazy king. Something he cant do over here because im not willing to cater to him (not when im not being paid or rewared in any way what so ever),eats over there...and all for the good of my wife, so he says.