new appartment rules or hatefull biggots?

the wife is out of town, the buthead is away too. Just me an the pup in an overly warm appartment. They recently opened the pool, though it is not much of one. Ive seen bigger mudpuddles downtown when it rains by the wife's favorite cupcake place! But anyway, i figured that i would take a short dip before dinner. Its a small pool so it should be nice an kinda warm. Some teens were just leaving,2 boys and 2 girls. The girls were snickering, no doubt because some old fat lady with glasses, namely me, was dressed in a one piece and headed for the pool. My first thought was "puhleeease! Is that the best you can do?" ive grown up being teased and tormented since kindergarden all the way through to high school graduation. If you want to get to me you gotta hike it up a couple of notches, maybe even get creative. These girls? Borring. I smiled at them and complemented their atire, which looked like something my mom would have tossed out or given to dad to use to mop up grease in the garage. The boys were just leaving,and i had just gotten in the gate when the groundskeeper came rushing up. She told me that i could not go swimming because there was no other adult pressent, and the boys were leaving, so i could not go in the water. Then she told me it was a federal law and i should read my rental agreement under pool rules. I walked away, a confused mix of emotions swimming about inside of me...this person knows me! Has seen me way before i recolored my hair, back when i was sporting 4-5 inches of gray roots since the last time i dyed my hair red! I went back to the appartment. At first i thought, mabe she really didnt recognize me, or maybe there really is a law im unaware of. I had barely started searching when there came a ring on the doorbell. Itwas her, telling me that someone else was in the pool so i could now go swimming. I thanked her an closed the door. She knew exactly who i was! She knew i was more than old enough to swim on my own! She was just being a biggot! It could be 130 in the frillin' shade, im not stickin my toe in that pool! And i am moving just as soon as i can! 4 teens with no adult suppervision can be in the pool, but a 44 year old woman can not be in the pool alone? How frilled up is that???

well, it took me awhile but i found an outfit my wife could use as a swim suit...unfortunatly it was a size or two too small. I swear, once we have a place of our own im getting a sewing machine and all these designers can be damned! Anyway... We went swimming together in the appartment pool. I wish i had known ahead of time that it wasnt heated, i wouldnt have made such a fuss... But it was ok enough after a while. Then the snooty mannager lady\grounds keeper came out. My wife started talking to her and asking her about where it said that it was a 'federal law' that i could not go swimming alone. Well, miss snooty got up like a shot, proclaiming it was a federal law and then pointed to a most confusing sign. First it said 'no swimming alone'. Then it said that if you were under 14 you had to be with an adult. No where on this sign did it show any ordinance number. My wife brought this to her attention and she got up like a shot and started rapid scanning through everything that was posted. She did not find anything, but still swore she had seen it somewhere and that it was law. i was proud of myself for i kept my emotions in check, even though i was furrious and wanted to scream that she was a liar and had been caught!